It’s been a rough past few weeks for me. I wish I could have a more positive update for you, but that’s how life goes. It’s just a series of peaks and valleys and I’ve been stuck in a rift at the nadir of a valley recently. Don’t fret – I haven’t given up on my book, just set it aside for some time.
I don’t know if any of you deal with this, but I’ve always had a problem with depression. It’s not as serious as it is for some folks; suicide or any self-injurious behaviors certainly aren’t on my radar. I just find that when I fall into this vortex I lose all motivation for doing the things I love, whether it be writing, reading, painting, or gardening. I just want to lay in bed all day and do nothing. When I do find that odd moment of inspiration, there’s always something else that needs to be done first, and by the time I’ve finished that task the inspiration as evaporated in a cloud of dust. Poof. Damn priorities. Stress doesn’t help either, and I’ve been dealing with a lot of family-related stress lately.
Part of the problem is that my story has grown boring. I’m at 50k words, about halfway through the novel, and it’s turning out to be much longer than I anticipated. About 20k words ago, my protagonist found herself in a new environment where I had to introduce about nine new characters in addition to having her adjust to the abrupt change. Because of this, the action has waned. After a few weeks of mulling it over, I’ve decided to part slightly with my original outline and throw some danger into the mix to speed things up. This means sacrificing a few intended subplots involving supporting characters. But since I intend to write this as a five to six book series, I’m sure I’ll find time to return to those subplots in the future. In the meantime, I will push forward with these changes and hope to have a more positive update soon!